The GLUG has a dream

***Dear Invisible Friends,

Forgive my lack of posting! We drove back late Friday from Shreveport to avoid the hurricane, and I just now got everything settled.

First, I have to thank the lovely Clumbsy Cookie for giving me the "I love you this much award!" It was very kind and I appreciate it so much. It made me tingle in my toes, I was so tickled.

Next, I have to thank the darling Corianne at Gourmet Love Affair for giving me the Brilliante Weblog Award. If you haven't been to her blog, you should jump over there right now. She and her husband create amazing dishes...all made from love of course!

Next, I have to thank the wonderful Marjie for giving me the Kick Ass Blogger award. Marjie is a wonderful superwoman who wrangles more children than I could handle in a lifetime and manages to sew and cook drool-worthy dishes. She's tougher than Hilary and Palin combined! Thanks Marjie!

The rules of this award state I must post the rules and nominate five other bloggers.

The rules are:
1) Choose 5 kick-*** bloggers
2) Let them know they've been awarded
3) Link back to the person who awarded you
4) Link back to MammaDawg

The five bloggers I wish to award are (Grace and Prudy, congrats for getting the award too!):

1) Clumbsy Cookie (Why? Because I love you this much!) (See above for link.)
2) Corianne (One word: Ribs) (See above for link.)
3) Marie at A Year From Oak Cottage
4) Lore at Culinarty by Lore
5) Bunny at Bunny's Warm Oven

And, because I never follow rules, I also want to give this to Jen at Tater Tots and Jello Congrats ladies!


Now, without further ado, I give you the GLUG. And stay tuned tomorrow for the new Miss Pickles!!! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Everything was done. The dishes had been put away, the suitcases had been unloaded and I had finally found my glasses.

I was halfway through the massive mound of laundry that had mysteriously accumulated and had just cleaned the house.

Taking a deep breath, I plopped on the couch and closed my eyes.

Something tickled my nose. I opened my eyes to a green blob.

"HELLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" a familiar voice bellowed, sticking his already blurry face closer to mine.

"Oh boy," I muttered.

"Are you not excited to see me?" the GLUG shrieked in a wounded tone. Staggering back so he was standing on my chest, he clutched his skinny green arms to his heart and howled as if I had stabbed him. "How can you not love me? How can you not adore me? I am the GLUG! The Ginormous Lime Green Unusual Gnat!"

"You know, you tell me that every time you come see me," I observed.

"Because I have to!" the GLUG bellowed, flinging his arms out. "I'm so dazzling, you might forget! You might think to yourself, 'Who is that charming creature? Who is that fabulous insect? Why, it's the GLUG! The Ginormous Lime Green Unusual"--

"Ben's in his office," I interrupted as he spun in circles, waving his arms wildly as he pirouetted across my collar bone.

"I don't want to see him," the GLUG sniffed, plopping down on my chest.

"He's mean."

I raised an eyebrow.

"He wouldn't listen to my brilliant idea!" the GLUG bellowed, whacking me in the chest with his tiny hand for emphasis. "Plus, he's got all those antlers in there now. It's terrifying. I refuse to go in there."

"It's just antlers," I said. "It's not like a deer head or anything."

"How would you like it if I hung a bunch of hair up on the wall?" the GLUG shouted, thrusting his face close to mine. "It would disturb you, wouldn't it?"

It would, but I wasn't going to admit that to the GLUG. "What's your brilliant idea?" I asked, hoping to distract him. He beamed and leaped up in the air, his iridescent green wings fluttering.

"I," he stated dramatically, "am going to be a SUPERHERO!" He flung his arms in the air and perched dramatically on my shoulder.

I blinked at him.

"Are you not IMPRESSED?" he bellowed. "Are you not ECSTATIC? Are you not AMAZED and STUNNED and QUIVERING in fear?"

"Have you been reading the thesaurus again?" I asked.

"That's not the point!" the GLUG shouted, shaking his green hands in my face. "The point is I'm going to be a superhero and you haven't fainted or anything. The least you could do is shriek or squeal in delight!"

"I think it's wonderful you're going to be a superhero," I said, patting his little green head. It was no bigger than the tip of a marker. "What are your powers going to be?"

The GLUG thought for a moment, tapping his green finger against his head. "I'm going to fly," he announced. "And eat tasty leaves."

"That's...lovely," I said, smiling. I wasn't going to remind the GLUG he did all that now.

"And I'm going to have a Flying Chihuahua for a sidekick," he continued. "And leap buildings in a single bound! And do you know what the best part is?"

"What?" I asked.

"I'm going to have a cape!" he bellowed. " A green cape with a golden G, L, U, G on the back!"

"It sounds great!" I said. "So when do you start?"

The GLUG tilted his head and cupped a hand to his ear. "I hear someone in trouble now!" he shouted. Slapping a construction paper black mask to his face, he shouted, "It's a bug, it's a gnat, it's.... the GLUG to the rescue!"

Thrusting his fist in the air, he flew across the living room to the Land of the Flowered Bed. All I could do was grin and wonder what Cookies in the Land of the Flowered Bed was going to think of the new super hero coming to save the day.