Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Halloween Festivities

On a dark night on October 29, I came into the world. The chilly air caused the candles in my belly to flicker, as they burned brightly. With my gap-toothed smile, I grinned happily throughout the night.

The next day wasn't too eventful. The plastic skeleton was whining about being in the cobwebs and arguing with my friend Yaak, who was named after a hockey player. Yaak was a lot taller than me, and spoke in a fake British accent.

"I'm tangled in these stupid cobwebs," the plastic skeleton whined. "I don't even have a name. How horrible is that? I just spend my time wrapped up in cobwebs like a fly. There's not even a spider. If there was a spider this would make sense but no- there's just me, in the cobwebs."

"You are a whiner," Yaak said haughtily. "As the premier pumpkin-"

"You're not the premeier pumpkin-" I said.

"Really?" Yaak laughed. "I'm taller than you, my smile is larger, and I don't have goofy gap teeth. I believe I am the premier pumpkin."

"You're just an arrogant twit," the plastic skeleton shot back as a bird landed on a tree. "Don't poop on me. Excuse me- oh no. Put your tail feathers down. Don't do it. I said- DON'T DO IT! I can't get away! EEEWWWW! Ah man, it's in my mouth!"

And it went on like this the rest of the day, Yaak arguing with the plastic skeleton and the plastic skeleton whining about his position. The butterflies ignored them as they flew by, much to the skeleton's dismay. He was convinced if enough butterflies flapped their wings at the same time, it would create enough wind to blow him out of the cobwebs. He was never able to convince the cobwebs of this.

After another cool night with the flickering candles in my belly, it was the Day. It was Halloween! All day I felt the anticipating anxiousness in my shell.

"I wonder what trick-or-treaters we'll see!" I said excitedly.

"Trick-or-treating is sooo childish!" Yaak said disdainfully. "We'll be lucky if we're not crushed by teenagers."

"Crushed?" asked the plastic skeleton.

"Yes," Yaak said. "Teenagers tend to smash pumpkins in the streets. You can hear their screams throughout the night. They lay in the streets, sobbing- it's the most terrifying thing in the world."

I was petrified. What if I became a smashed pumpkin? What if my blueberry candles covered the insides of my belly? What if my warm glowing face became the last image anyone saw before I exploded into chunks, only to coat the bottoms of tires? Suddenly, I was not looking forward to trick-or-treating.

Night fell, and the candle burned in my tummy. I braced myself for the trick-or-treaters, terrifed of what would come. If I could have squinched my eyes, I would have. Instead, I just grinned at the world with my gap-toothed smile.

Suddenly, I heard footsteps. They were coming. The people that were going to destroy my hope were making their way towards me. Could I run? Could I hide? Suddenly I heard-

"Trick-or-treat!"

They didn't want me after all! They just wanted candy. Delicious, sweet candy. They didn't want me after all! I began to laugh happily! My gap-toothed grin got even better.

I saw pirates, fairies, vampires and football players. But my favorite part of the night? Grinning happily into the night. After all- I was a happy pumpkin.