Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Blond Duck goes to a wedding.

You would have never guessed it, but I generally hate weddings.

We've been to a lot of weddings, and Ben's been a groomsmen in over half of them. We've seen fancy weddings, conservative weddings, casual weddings (ours) and weddings with brides that puts Star Jones to shame.

But we had never been to a wedding like this before.

Ben's buddy Greg (grey shirt) from college married a gorgeous small-town Texas girl named Kelli on Saturday. (I don't have a picture of her.) Both of these fine folks are from established families in the community. They also love to entertain and throw lavish events. So as we drove up to Killeen, Texas, I could only imagine what was in store for us.

Friday around noon, we left the Babies with Mom and hit the Interstate. We stopped in Austin to have lunch with my Dad. You can only guess what he treated us to.

I was so happy. I had barbecue smeared all over my face, my hands, meat jammed in my teeth...it was pure heaven. I'm still drooling.

After I was hosed down, we made it to the hotel. Greg's parents were kind enough to provide us not only with our hotel room but Ben's tux, so we hardly had to do anything. We just showed up. The hotel was buzzing about this wedding, which was the thing in town. It was so big that the reception was at the convention center. Six hundred had been invited and four hundred were attending.

I dug some more meat out of my teeth and grinned at the ladies. They weren't impressed.

When we got to our room, we found sussies.

Not only did we have a gift bag full of goodies, but we had a three page itinerary with a map and directions. I had never seen such an organized wedding in my life. We had once been at a wedding where the rehearsal dinner was pizza in the lobby with torn pizza boxes as plates.

After the rehearsal, we drove to the rehearsal dinner. It was a very elegant affair at a Italian restaurant. Waiters were serving champagne, toasts were given and salmon and steak were served.

I spent the night trying not to act like I'd fallen off the turnip truck. Most of the families there were very established, upscale (old money) families. They were very kind and generous. I was beyond intimidated.

To make myself more at ease, I tied a bow on Ben's head in the middle of dinner. I am nothing but classy.

We returned to the hotel after 11, where I immediately crashed into bed. Ben attended the bachelor party, whining that he was tired and would be back in an hour. Around 4 a.m., he came skipping in beaming about winning $75. I found out the next day all he had done was whine about wanting to go to bed as he kept winning hands. The other boys weren't so thrilled.

So while Ben wuffled about staying up all night, I scurried to the hotel gym. For two hours, I snarled at anyone who dared to enter.

Then I ate this. I couldn't let a perfectly good pie go to waste, could I? That's blasphemy. Don't worry, I had lunch first. Greg's parents (these were the most super-organized people I ever met) had catered sandwiches brought in a small suite for the groomsmen and their dates to hang out in until the wedding. There were chips, drinks, cookies, finger sandwiches....

The pie was all mine. I snarled at anyone who came near.

We were down in the lobby by three to get to the church for the 6 p.m. wedding. I made Ben take a picture.

While Ben did groomsmen things, I ran around and helped when I was needed. Then I sat down and chatted with one of the bridesmaid's mothers and the other rejected groomsmen's wives until the ceremony.

The ceremony was held in a old Methodist church. There were candles everywhere, lush bouquets of white flowers and satin ribbons at the edge of the pews. Everyone wore elegant jewels and their best clothing. The bride wore a gorgeous long white dress covered in sequins and elegant beading.

I found some more meat in my teeth. Ben waited until after the pictures were taken to yank his tie off.

The reception was even more gorgeous. The bride's colors were chocolate brown and light blue, so there were chocolate brown chairs and runners down the tables with these bouquets on the table. And candles. Lots of candles. We almost had a veil disaster when she got too close the the candles. We sat at the head table in front with the bride and groom (because we're special). Again, this was the most formal and elegant thing I'd ever been to. When dinner was served, waiters streamed out from black curtains at the front of the room and lined behind our chairs. At a signal, they served our plates with a flourish and streamed back into the kitchen to do the same thing for the other tables.

I tried not to knock anything over.

Then the evening was a whirlwind of dancing, toasts and laughter and conversation. The cutest thing were all the little girls at the wedding. They spent the night running around the dance floor. When the bride danced with her husband for the first time, they lined up at the edge of the floor and reached out with their fingers to feel her dress as she twirled by. They spent the rest of the night racing around the tile floor and tangoing with each other.

Ben said I couldn't go out there.

So this was, in fact, a wedding I didn't despise. It was elegant, the families were gracious and it was a lovely weekend away. In fact, we had a wonderful time.

Brides, need anyone to help with your wedding? I'm available.

You should probably re-think that. Ribs, anyone?


Prudy said...

Blond Duckie, you look smashing in your black dress. I doubt anyone was looking at your teeth at all.:) I loved your turnip truck line. If there's any more details about this story, you had better email me!

doggybloggy said...

you and your husband are a pretty - no- handsome- no - good looking - couple and that rib is prehistoric

Katherine Aucoin said...

Duckie you and your hubby look like you had a fabulous time and would you mind passing me a rib? You look gorgeous in your black dress. Frame that picture of you and Ben!

kellypea said...

I love elegant weddings. I always have. It's gotta be a princess thing that never goes away no matter how old I get. Who knows.

I have a surprise for you at my blog...heeeeeeeee...

Wait. Is that a piece of meat in your teeth?

Maria said...

Looks like a fun time! You look great all dolled up!!

Audrey said...

BD, thanks for visiting! Definitely, watch Miss Pettigrew, but read the book too (the book was especially charming!) I love the leopard!

Marjie said...

I'm coming for the ribs, sweetie! Would you believe I've only been a guest at 4 weddings? And never one at a posh hotel with pre-wedding snacks and pie! Good for you, defending your pie!

Greg C said...

Im wandered in here from who knows where but I loved the post. The only thing I would have done differently was to pull out one of those ribs from a bag and say no thanks I brought my own when the waiter tried to serve me. Don't you just hate orginized people?

Lore said...

Ahaaa! So this was the wedding you told me about. Well the truth is I hate weddings too but unlike you I never attended one (not even my own haha). Luckily my friends understood me (heck I only told them like since I was 12 :D) and they didn't mind (they are the best!). What I like doing is drop by when they come back from their honeymoon(and the stress is gone) and have some good quality time together.
Those ribs got me hungry again!

jenjen said...

Duckie -- you look so beautiful. You and your hubby are so cute together. I am gladBen you had a nice time. It looked like a fabulous wedding! I am glad you're back!

Grammy Staffy said...

Wow...what a wedding...I'm glad my girls didn't see this blog before they were married.

I would hate to get the bill for that event. Obviously the parents are not school teachers.... on our school teacher's budget we could never do a wedding like that.

You look so cute...b-b-q in teeth and all.

have a great week

carol said...

Looks like you guys had a great time at the wedding-and that was SOME RIB you had there!!!!!

TavoLini said...

hahahaha--that rib is ridiculous!

I love the pic with a bow on your husband's head :) Looks like a fun time!

Rhea said...

Great recap of the wedding! I loved all your photos. I miss Austin!!

Pam said...

You crack me up. Those ribs look amazing. The wedding sounded a bit formal for me but I am sure it was a wonderful experience. You and your husband both looked incredible!

Rosie said...

You look beautiful in your little balck dress Blond Duckie and it looks like you and your hubby had a lovely time!

Gosh and those ribs look wonderful mmmmm

Aimée said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog! The wedding looks like fun!

Laurie said...

I hope you got a lot of dancing in while you were there! It sounds like a wonderful wedding extravaganza!

And for the dancer in you.. I have been watching Step Up 1 and 2 for the past week and a half religiously.. well almost!! :)

Thanks for stopping by my blog!!

Danielle Barlow said...

Thanks for coming by my blog! Wow! what a wedding - I've not been to one since my own, and then I cried and wanted to go home early because I was tired! Not much good at parties, me!





Linda said...

Now that sounds like a wedding even I would go to! You do make a cute couple.

nikkicrumpet said...

Very funny post...and boy did you look beautiful in that black dress...and the hubby looked pretty dang spiffy in the tux....and the bow!
You asked about joining SITS...FOR SURE everyone can join...only takes a second and it's lots of fun. Tons of new people to meet and lots of give-a-ways. Just click on the link on my site...or go to thesecretisinthesauce.blogspot.com and click where it says new people "read" this . You'll love it!

Veronica said...

600 guests?!! Oh but only 400 could make it-much better! I will say that you look positively elegant in your dress-no need for intimidation there. Sounds like an incredible time.

Lo said...

Glad you had a great time (sounds like it was done just as it should be)... I LOVE the pictures. Especially the one with you and the barbeque :)

Sandy Toes said...

What fun...that black dress is so beautiful! You look great!
-Sandy Toes

Sharon said...

You & your hubby look fabulous! Kudos to you for heading to the gym while he nursed a hangover. Oh, I would've staked claim on the pie too!

Jane said...

The wedding sounds a wonderful experience! You and Ben look stunning in the pre-wedding picture. The rib photo made me think of the flintstones! Tony would have enjoyed sitting down to a rib that size (I would too). Jane x

Marie said...

OH Duckie, you are so cute there with the barbeque smeared all over your face! tee hee I have never had barbeque!!! I must get me some, it looks so good. That wedding sounds very similar to the one we had here at the Big House I work at this past summer, and a LOT of work it was! Ben looks terribly handsome in his suit and you look fabulous in your little black dress!! You are a lovely couple. Love you to bits! XXOO

Emiline said...

You look really nice and classy in your dress.

I love ribs! I love jamming meat into my teeth.

And pecan pie is the best.

Dee said...

*wolf whistle* you looked fab in that black number. How on earth do you pack away food and still look the way you do *pout*

Love the ribbon look on Ben :)

We had a hippy do in Australia, but sometimes I wonder if a proper wedding wedding would have been fun. Hmmm...

Grace said...

i adore weddings, and i adore you. i hope you're not still digging meat out of your teeth. :)

sassy stephanie said...

You are too funny! Nothing like Texas BBQ, eh?

Looks like you guys had a blast. How did the pups do?

Bunny said...

Oh Duckie the 2 of you looked smashing together!

noble pig said...

Oh my sounds like an awesome weekend. I love weddings like that, I've been in one and it was awesome. Fabulous details you have provided for us! Thank you.

Tiaras and Tantrums said...

looks like a great time- and you looks smashing!

The W.O.W. factor said...

LOL! Oh a Country Bumpkin goes Classy! Sounds like you did your 'homework' on attending a gloriously elegant event,...even if you forgot to stick toothpicks in your purse for meat plucking!
You are too funny!

freefun0616 said...