Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Just Duckie

After a long day at work, I came home and fixed dinner. As I was cleaning up the kitchen, lost in my own thoughts, I opened up the back patio door. I raised my head and froze, still holding the trash sack in my hand. In front of me stood several white ducks, peering at me curiously.

"Excuse me!" one duck called. "Can you help us find something?"

"Sure, I suppose," I said, dumbfounded.

"Wonderful!" the duck exclaimed. "Do you know where The Pond is?"

"The pond?" I echoed.

"No," the duck said, shaking his bill. "The Pond."

"I'm not quite sure what you mean by The Pond," I said, setting down the trash sack.

The ducks sighed, obviously vexed by my lack of knowledge. "You know," another duck said. "The Pond. The Pond where you, the Blonde Duck, resides."

"Oh!" I cried, immediately understanding. "The Pond!" The ducks nodded enthusiastically. "Well, you're in the Pond."

The ducks looked at me, looked at the yard, and looked back at me. "Excuse me?" one duck said. "This is THE Pond?"

"Well, it's not all of the Pond," I huffed. "There's more inside." The ducks sighed in relief and waddled after me through the house. I gave them a tour. While they enjoyed the Land of the Flowered Bed and the garage where Henry the Lizard lay sleeping, they kept quacking to themselves and gnashing their beaks. We returned to the patio, where they perched on the patio table.

"Well, what did you think?" I asked. The ducks conferred then looked at me.

"We don't like it," one duck said. "It's dull," the second duck said. "I like the Land of the Flowered Bed," the third duck ventured. I smiled and thanked him. He grinned back at me and asked for some tuna.

As I prepared a dish of tuna for the ducks, they discussed their grievances with me.

"The ponds in your pond were quite white and warm," the first duck said. "Or small and metal," the second duck said, nodding enthusiastically. "A bit too yuppie for me," the third duck confessed through loud smacks. "I would feel like I was in a spa."

"Again with the spa," I muttered. As they had traveled all the day to see the Pond, I felt obligated to appease them. "So what would you like to see?" The ducks muttered among each other, than turned to me over their plates of tuna.

"We would like a pond within the Pond," the first duck said. "An outdoor pond, not a big indoor pond," the second duck clarified. "With flowers and frogs!" the third duck said enthusiastically, finishing his tuna. "Some cattails too, if you please."

"You want a pond in the backyard?" I asked. The ducks nodded. "We can do that," I said. The ducks quacked happily. "We would also like a slide," the first duck said. "And a cabana bar with fish juice," the second duck said. "Isn't that a bit yuppie?" the third duck asked anxiously. He was shushed by the other two ducks. Three sets of bright eyes looked up at me expectantly.

"I'll see what we can do," I said, trying not to smile.

"Until then, you can find us in the Spa at the Land of the Flowered Bed," the first duck said, toddling off.

"I hear they serve smores," the second duck said, waddling quickly behind.

"Thank you for the tuna," the third duck said shyly, using his beak to throw away his plate. "When do we get our pond?"

"Soon," I promised. He smiled and waddled away quickly around the corner. I began to clean up the half chewed plates of tuna.

"Blonde Duck?" the third duck asked. I turned to look at him. "It's a very nice Pond," he grinned. I grinned back and finished cleaning up, humming to myself. Here at The Pond, things are just ducky.