I'll just lay here awhile. Maybe she'll stop snoring soon.
"Miranda, there's a puppy in here for you!" The Blond Duck's sleeping face burst into a smile. She rolled over with her arms outstretched, crushing Bear as she pawed for the puppy in her dreams. Ben scooped a wufffling Bear out from under her stomach and retreated from the room as she began to snore again.
This morning, as I got ready for work, Ben said, "Bear was crying last night."
"Is he ok?" I asked, immediately racing for the kitchen.
"He's fine," Ben continued as he followed me. "I let him in the bed with you last night and you nearly crushed him."
"I what?" I stared at him.
"He was licking your face and you were flailing around and snapping and snarling at him," Ben said, clearly enjoying my foul mood at night.
"What was I doing?" I asked. I never said I was intelligent in the mornings.
"Sleeping," Ben replied.
"I never woke up?" I asked.
Ben shook his head gleefully.
I just wanted to snuggle. And wuffle.
So Invisible Friends, I have a warning for you: If you ever catch me sleeping, do not lick my nose or offer me a puppy. I can't guarantee the outcome.
And I obviously won't be able to hear your wuffles of distress.
And yes. This is a true story.