Tuesday, May 08, 2007

The GLUG, the BUG, the SMUG and the HUG

Ben was driving to work one morning when a familiar green face plastered itself against his windshield with a loud thump.

"HELLLO!!!" a familiar voice bellowed. "I'm back!"

"Hello," Ben said unenthusiastically, carefully watching the road. The GLUG stared at him with his jaw dropped. "Excuse me!" he bellowed, waving most of his thin green arms as he clutched onto the windshield wiper. "Don't you remember me?"

"How could I forget?" Ben asked dryly. "You're the GLUG."

"I'm the only GLUG," the GLUG said arrogantly. "I'm the only Ginormous Lime-Green Unusual Gnat in the world!"

"That's not possible," Ben said, momentarily distracted from glaring at the other drivers. "You have to be related to someone. You have to have brothers and sisters. You couldn't just have appeared out of the sky."

"How do you know?" the GLUG asked, grinning idiotically at him. "Maybe I'm the GLUG of your dreams!"

"More like my nightmares," Ben muttered.

"I'm ignoring that," the GLUG said, inspecting under his windshield wipers. "There's no tasty leaves!" he howled in anguish, glaring at Ben pointedly.

"Sorry," Ben said, who did not sound sorry at all. "I washed my car."

"No matter," the GLUG said, a slow grin spreading over his face. "You've been chosen."

"Chosen for what?" Ben stared at him in alarm.

"You've been chosen," the GLUG said ominously. "You'll meet the Three Bugs of Knowledge, who will guide you on your way."

"My way to where?" Ben asked nervously.

"I don't know," the GLUG shrugged. "I'm guessing not to work, because you just missed your exit!"

Ben swore and got into the turn lane as the GLUG laughed manically. He laughed so hard, his thin green tummy moved faster than a hummingbird's wing. "Oooh, a fly!" he cooed, delicately plucking it from the windshield wiper and popping it in his mouth. "The first bug to visit you will be the BUG."

"How can a bug named BUG visit me?" Ben said in a sarcastic toned. "Well it's better than being named Mildred or Zoe, don't you think?" the GLUG said, shuddering at the thought of the horrible names. "Ta-ta now!" And with that, the GLUG floated away in the breeze.

Disturbed by the idea by meeting more talking bugs, Ben went to work and headed to his desk. When he sat down, he saw something by his computer monitor that made him gasp.

"I'm going crazy!" he whispered to himself. "I've gone mad! I'm loonier than Miranda's father! This can't be.....can it?"

To be continued.................