Friday, November 14, 2008

Miss Pickles must say goodbye. For Now. Also, a meme.

Before we conclude Miss Pickles (don't worry! There will be more! This is just the first of many adventures.), I've got a meme to do. Maryann tagged me to do 15 Questions on the last 10 people who commented on my last post. The newly tagged winners are:

1) Lorraine E.

2) Nikicrumpet

3) Carmen

4) Sharon

5) Theresa

6) Pam

7) Jen

8) Kitt

9) Aleta

10) Marjie

Now Mary Ann went to all the trouble of saying neat things about each blogger in a very specific and convoluted order, but I'm tired. And lazy. And I just don't want to. This is the Pond after all, and Queen Bitty has granted me permission to slither through this meme.

So for the real meme rules, go see Mary Ann. Mine are much more simple.

Ten things I like about these featured Invisible Friends, in random order dictated by my brain:

1) I adore the restaurants Lorraine features on her blog. I always feel like I'm some kind of exotic, sophisticated traveler sipping from thick mugs and dining on food with enchanting ingredients.

And then I remember there's snot on my shirt and Bear's licking my leg. But it was nice while it lasted.

2) Nikki is the only woman I know who can make her backyard fascinating. Most of the time when people talk about their houses/ kids/ very important hobbies my eyes glaze over, but not with her. She could make a single hair the most fascinating topic you have ever seen.

3) I can't translate Carmen's blog, but I think it's pretty. :)

4) Sharon is such a good newlywed cook. When I was a newlywed I burned grilled cheese sandwiches, stopped up the sink in our brand new house by shoving a bucket of peeled potatoes down it and had fed him a dinner of raw fried chicken.

5) Fellow Chihuahua lover Theresa comes up with the coolest baking creations. I just stare and drool. That's all I'm really good for, anyway.

6) Pam doesn't know it, but I'm plotting my way to her kitchen right now. I'll grow so fat from her food that I'll get stuck in the door like Pooh did in Rabbit's house and they'll hang antlers off my butt.

I do love mooses.

7) Jen has the ability to make her home, children and life look gorgeous. Please come help me. Please.

8) I love Kitt's dry sense of humor.

9) Aleta fascinates me. She has a talking cat, a sarcastic fiance and a fairy taking a dump. I think she'd be a fabulous buddy in person. If she didn't run away from me first!

10) I know Marjie probably wants to beat me for saying this, but I still can't believe she had nine children. I'm twitching just thinking about it. And I don't know how she can homeschool, raise kids and wrangle Thor, sew and cook. Do you give lessons in time management? I'll pay.

And now, for Miss Pickles...


"Principal!" Ms. Gunter shrieked, a sinister smile stretching across her pinched face. "Miss Pickles has taken the children off school property without permission!"

Mr. Bumble looked up from the dandelions he was sniffing. "Who?"

"Miss Pickles!" Ms. Gunther snapped. "The substitute you hired!"

"Where did she go?" the elderly principal asked, looking around in confusion.

"She's right there," Ms. Gunther bellowed, pointing to Miss Pickles. Grinning, Miss Pickles waved as she polished her pogo stick. "You must fire her immediately!"

Mr. Bumble shoved his glasses up his nose and blinked a set of thick white eyelashes. "Why?"

"Because she broke the rules!" Ms. Gunther screamed, stomping her foot. "It's wrong!"

Clutching his dandelions, Mr. Bumble turned to Miss Pickles. "Where did you take the children?"

"On an adventure," Miss Pickles replied as she slid her pogo stick into her large pink bag. "We were learning all about the Earth."

"That's lovely," Mr. Bumble beamed. He wiggled his fingers and floated towards the door.

"Principal Bumble!" Ms. Gunther shrieked. "Surely you're going to punish her?"

The principal sighed and whirled around. "And why would I do that?" he asked in a mild voice rigid with irritation. "Ms. Gunther this is a school, not a prison. These are children. They deserve to have fun. Miss Pickles has taught dozens of children, including my own. Her methods may be odd, but they work."

"But sir!" Ms. Gunther gaped.

"It wouldn't hurt you, Ms. Gunther, to add a bit of frivolity into your life," the principal said, shaking his finger at the stunned woman. "Now if you'll excuse me, there's some flowers out back that need sniffing." He pranced down the hallway, humming as he twirled his voluminous ear hair.

Miss Pickles giggled. Ms. Gunther whirled around, her eyes blazing and her mouth drawn into a hard knot.

"I'll show you, Miss Pickles!" she cried. "I'll make sure you have a miserable time here at Ordinary Elementary! Just you wait!" She slammed into the building and stormed off to her room.

The entire class was silent for precisely one moment before bursting into giggles.

"That was great," Mason cheered.

"You told her," Don said admiringly.

"She should eat something," Ralph advised. "She'd be a lot nicer."

"I can't believe that worked," Beatrice muttered.

The class quieted down and Miss Pickles smiled. "I've had a grand time, duckies," she said, beaming as tears filled her eyes. "But it's time for me to go."

"Go?" Mason gasped. "You can't go."

Miss Pickles smiled sadly and pointed to a hot pink balloon floating over the sidewalk. "That's my ride," she said. "I'll miss you children! Did you have a happy adventure?"

"Incredible," Don said.

"Unbelievable," Beatrice said.

"Don't forget what you promised me," Ralph warned, who was still not over giving up his chocolate pies.

"You can't leave!" Mason cried, flinging his arms around her waist. "You can't! It will be so boring and dull. We'll have hours of homework, no recess and barely any lunch!"

"We won't ride in a bubble," Don said sadly.

"Or drop into the Earth," Ralph added.

Even Beatrice admitted, "We won't learn nearly as much."

Now the tears were streaming down Miss Pickles face and dewing onto her frizzy hair. "Oh duckies!" she cried, flinging her arms around them. "Haven't I taught you anything? Don't you realize that I will always return for an adventure?"

"When?" Mason demanded. "How long?"

"It could be as soon as tomorrow," Miss Pickles said with an impish grin.

"Why not tomorrow?" Mason asked. "Why can't you just stay with us?"

"That's the thing about adventures, duckie," Miss Pickles said, her voice serious and her eyes sparkle free. "They come and go whenever they are needed. They can't be planned or scheduled."

Mason shook his head. She couldn't leave. She couldn't leave after all this. It wasn't right and it wasn't fair. Miss Pickles jabbed hot pink aviator glasses on her head and flung open her arms.

"So dry those tears and slap on some smiles! This is not a good bye. It is simply a see you later." She leaned down, looking at Mason's face carefully.

"I'll see you later," she said, her cheeks dimpling. "Right?"

Mason wanted to shake his head, but there was something in her smile. Even though adults usually lied, he knew she would be back.

"Right," he whispered, forcing himself not to think of the boring classroom he'd have to return to in the morning.

Miss Pickles hugged each of the children, whispering a special message in each ear. Then she grabbed her parasol, slung her pink bag over her shoulder and leaped into her hot air balloon.

"I'll see you soon," she cried, her voice echoing around the giant pink balloon that fluttered in the wind. "Until we meet again, duckies!"

Mason couldn't wait.


Lorraine E said...

Aww thankyou so much! When I read your blog I imagine that I'm in a big library and it all feels very special and magical with all the different tales :)

Debbie said...

Your chihuahua is soooo cute!!! I have two myself and just love them.

Cathy said...

I already miss Miss Pickles myself! I need to get myself a pair of those hot pink aviator glasses!!

Lilly's Life said...

Amazing - you are entertaining and whimsical and life doesnt get any better in blogland than that!.

raining sheep said...

I swear that I had a Ms. Gunther for a teacher...the world needs more Miss Pickles.

Magnolia Wedding Planner said...

Hi! I've arrived here from Carmen's blog and I find it fantastic! so freh and happy! That's what I was really looking for! Compliments!

Marjie said...

Bring more fun soon, Miss Pickles!

And as for time management, well, I don't write marvelous stories!

Ingrid said...

I've never thought of myself as an extremely lucky person, but right now I'm thanking my lucky stars that you didn't pick me to comment on............LOL!!!! You know if the writing thing doesn't pan out you should try your hand as a comic, 'cause girl you're a crack up!

Katherine Aucoin said...

Duckie you continue to amaze and entertain me!

jenjen said...

Ohhh Miss Pickles -- we will miss you so! What a great adventure Duckie! Thanks for sharing her with us. Thanks for the tag and kind words. You are wonderful! I hope you do something really fun and exciting this weekend with your darling hubby and cute little furry friends!

Dee said...

You're such a fun read everytime. Love the story, and LOVE the way you described each blog. I do like you, even if you have snot on your shirt :)

Sharon said...

Thanks for the kind words and an ending to a great story! You know, I still do all those bad newlywed cook things, I just don't tell you all those stories ;) Your dog is adorable!

Maria said...

Your dog is too cute!!

Pam said...

Goodbye for now Miss's been fun.

Thanks for passing this on to me. As for you coming to eat at my house...I'll set a place at the table for you. :)

Cakelaw said...

LOL - I like your meme with the altered rules - it is just what I needed first thing in the morning.

Bunny said...

Good by for now Miss pickles!!! I know she'll be back soon , she'll miss the kids...and Ralph's mommy's pies!

nikkicrumpet said...

I want Miss Pickles to teach my kids! And can I just say...thanks for tagging me...but even more. Thanks for the nicest compliment that I think I have ever been paid! You made me get all teary and when I read it out loud to my hubby he just smiled and said "it's true" which it isn't..but it's nice of both of you to say so! THANKS...I think I'll be floating on that niceness for weeks!!!!

alexandra's kitchen said...

Oh I hope Miss Pickles returns soon. Those poor children will be lost without her. Ms Gunter reminds me of my fourth-grade teacher, Mrs. Hennessee. She screamed at me when I accidentally broke her lava lamp. I have been traumatized ever since!

noble pig said...

Okay the princess picture is just too adorable for words.

Marie said...

I'm with Mason . . . I can't wait either!!! Thanks so much Duckie for this adorable character you have brought to life for me and for the lovely stories you pen for us here at the Pond. You're amazing and I hope you know that! I used to cook rubber chicken by the way, so there is hope for everyone!

Kitt said...

Well, I'm wondering ... which Kitt? The link is to Jen's blog. Me or another Kitt? (I mean, I like to think I have a sense of humor ...)

Anonymous said...

It's hard to be convoluted haha :)

Lori said...

LOL from number one because I SOOOOOOOOOOOO can identify with that!

Queen Bitty is adorable in her crown there.

Anonymous said...